New Year’s Resolutions…most of us make some every year. I mean, I guess it sort of makes sense, right? It is a new year, which logically makes it a good prospect for a fresh start. The New Year gives us the opportunity to look at the year that has just passed – our successes and failures; our health and well-being; our wishes and desires – and allows us to consciously decide to make choices that will positively shape our path and direction for the next 365 days.
Each year I make a few New Year’s Resolutions – but the two or three things that I know that I need to change or work on – never seem to get resolved. In fact, looking back on the past ten years, my resolutions haven’t changed that much. So last year, I wrote them down and stuck them to the wall in my office by my computer and glanced at them daily. I reasoned that, if my resolutions were literally ‘in my face’ every day that my chances of fucking them up, yet again, would be greatly diminished.
Well… let’s just say that I was happy when five weeks later the Chinese calendar ushered in a New Year – because, even though I do not follow the Chinese calendar – I was able to once again give myself a fresh start at living my words and working on my New Year’s Resolutions. And as the year passed, I was one Shiksa who was really happy on Yom Kippur – and not just because I wasn’t fasting – but because another New Year was upon us and I could repent my failings and make a conscious attempt to try and honor once again my New Year’s Resolutions.
Then as the year dwindled on, I was speaking to a girl in my spin class about my seeming inability to stick to a small list of things I was trying to do to better my life, annoyed at myself for only being able to moderately stick to a few of them when the mood suited me. She confided to me that she had been in rehab, and the best mantra she learned there was, that, every day is a new day and a new chance to start over. So basically, even if you mess up, the next day is a new day, and you once again have the opportunity to change your life for the better. And I really liked that; from then on, every day, when I woke up, it became a new day and a new chance for me to once again render an effort to make my New Year’s Resolutions stick.
And now ….we are in 2016, and I didn’t even have to make up a new list of New Year’s Resolutions. I just crossed out 2015 and with a black sharpie wrote 2016 overtop. Clearly, something isn’t working.
I would like to know the statistics on New Year’s Resolutions and the percentage of people who actually stick to them. I can’t be the only one who doesn’t live up to my own expectations of betterment. Are we making unrealistic resolutions? I began to wonder if this tradition of making New Years Resolutions should maybe be discontinued all together.
Then, I had the idea that instead of discarding the tradition of making New Year’s Resolutions, we could all try – ‘list swapping’. Maybe enlisting the help of those closest to us would help us achieve successful resolutions? I am sure that I could write a ‘resolution list’ of things that my friends and family should and could do to better their lives, and I am sure they in turn might have a ‘few’ items on a list for me. In essence, your closest peeps could mentor and monitor your much needed ‘resolutions.’
Upon reflection, actually after about five minutes of thought, I quickly realized that my ‘list swapping’ solution would result in the collapse of families, the demise of friendships, and the end to marriages all over the planet. New Year’s Resolutions are personal; they are between you and your inner-self, and no one really needs to know them. The fact that you can acknowledge that there are things you need and want to work on and change, is important. The conscious decision to make change is better than the unconscious unawareness of obstacles that are inhibiting you from becoming the best you can be.
A new day with a fresh start still means that there is hope that the things you want to work and change are doable, and really isn’t that what it is all about? Living your life to your full potential, doing your best that you can, making yourself the best you you can be? So what if it takes some of us longer than others?
So yippee, here I go again, 2016 – starting the New Year off right – my little list on my wall, next to my computer, with 2016 hand written above the stroked out 2015. Yet, I proceed with a sense of optimism, with the knowing comfort that the Chinese New Year is only five weeks away. And if I am still struggling by the time Yom Kippur – which brings in the Jewish New Year in mid-October – I still have the mantra that every day is a new day, to ensure that an effort can still be made when the mind and body are willing.
So in this New Year, 2016 – also the Chinese year of the Monkey and Hebrew year 5776 – while I once again take a stab at my New Year’s Resolutions, I thought maybe I would pass on some resolutions that I really feel would benefit my fellow Los Angelites (or at least me!)
New Year’s Resolutions for people of LA, Beverly Hills, and Hollywood…. can you please resolve to:
- When you drive a bad ass Bentley, Maserati or Ferrari, and if you are planning to angle park to take up two parking spots so no one can scratch your car that costs more than most homes in the Midwest – at the already packed Whole Foods parking lot in Beverly Hills – can you please ONLY do so at off hours? Can you resolve to be considerate?
- When you are eating in a restaurant and the server doesn’t bring out the food exactly the way you want it, or not fast enough for your taste, so you decide to yell, scream and decimate him for the whole restaurant to hear – can you instead stop and take a deep breath or take a Xanax and chill the fuck out? Your reaction, rather over reaction, does not get you better service it just make you look like a jerk. Can you please resolve to be kind?
- And in a state that is in a drought, even though you know El Nino is supposed to rear its rainy head, could you please stop watering the sidewalks? I am so tired of walking along the sidewalk only to see the sprinklers watering the concrete and missing the grass entirely. Can you please resolve to be environmentally friendly?
- And when I am sitting at a stop light, and it is red, and you decide to honk your horn at me, what do you expect me to do? I am at a stop light asshole! Are you thinking that honking your horn will make want me to run the red light so you can get to your, umm Botox injections or hair appointment on time? Can you please resolve to be patient and polite?
- And speaking of appointments, I know that you are a V.I.P because …..maybe your husband is a Studio head, or maybe your friend is a Celebrity and you rub against them enough so you seem to think that counts, or maybe you are just plain unorganized and blame your personal assistant for your tardiness, regardless….when you arrived 30 minutes late for your appointment – that makes my appointment run 30 minutes late – and guess what, I have a life too! So can you please resolve to be less of an egomaniac and more of a human being? (Yep, I know this one is gonna be a tough sell in Beverly Hills!)
- And guys and girls….Okay, so we have a date to hang or go out. And when I am dressed, hair-nails-make-up done, and ready to walk out the door at 7:45 because we decided to meet at 8 pm – and you call me to tell me you are running 20 minutes late which I know really means 45 minutes late – it really pisses me off. I now have to sit around dressed up unable to really do anything because I don’t want to ruin the look it took me a hour to create; or I can head to the location by myself, and wait for your late ass to get there, but risk looking like a ‘hooker-chick-or-desperate-Deb-bar-looser’. Could you be more considerate of me and my time? All we really have on this earth is time, so when you waste mine, you are taking away valuable moments of my life. So could you please resolve to be on TIME?
Enough said….Happy 2016 everyone! May you resolve to keep on working on your New Year’s Resolutions, because, as you see, there is always a new year ahead or a new day where you can start over. And every day of life, when you wake up and see the morning light, it means that you are lucky and blessed, and you have the power within you to make everything you dream for yourself and your life come true.