Chinese Fortune Cookie….
“Good news will be coming your way. It will be here any day!” I remember getting this fortune from my fortune cookie over a year ago, so either the good news came and went and it was so unspectacular that I never noticed it, or the Chinese definition of ‘any day’ does not translate so well into English.
Am I the only weirdo out there who really hopes that that the little piece of paper stuffed into the curled-up, cellophane-wrapped fortune cookie, tossed into my Chinese Food take-out bag, might actually have true meaning and come true? Of course, I only keep the ones I like, the others I forget about instantaneously….(it should be noted that I also read my horoscope – yep, one of those girls)….yet somehow these little inspirational ditties and hopeful proverbs are the perfect end to a take-out dinner, usually consumed at home with my dining partner I like to call – Cabernet.
Maybe instead of taking these Asian proverbs as beacons of hopefulness for ‘lottery’ like winning metaphors for life, perhaps we should look at them in more realistic terms. Possibly, the fortunes have come true; maybe we just didn’t see them for what they were, our expectations being as high as they are. Maybe these proverbs of hope, or prophecies of expectations for our life, really do come true – but their reality is not at all as we imagined.
As it turns out, a prediction from a Chinese fortune cookie could come true for two people at the same time, living in two entirely different worlds; but the fortune cookie prophecies might not be the miraculous-life-altering- grandiose events we anticipated. You see, it’s all how your look at life.
Let’s compare how Chinese Fortune Cookie fortune could come true for a Canadian and a Los Angeleno at the same time:
“Good news will be coming your way. It will be here any day!”
Canadian – ‘The Arctic wind chill that was predicted to make today’s temperature feel like -60 degrees Celsius, has veered south, so head out and enjoy this crisp wintery -29 degree day. But don’t forget your tuque eh, as exposed skin will still freeze in less than a minute!
Angeleno – ‘It looks like the frigid cold snap we have been experiencing from that Canadian Arctic blast, that has been bringing daytime temperatures to the low 50’s, has ended. Today will reach 65, so you can grab a heavy sweater and leave your winter jacket behind!
“You will soon receive pleasant news of a personal nature.”
Canadian – The groundhog didn’t see his shadow today; Spring is only six weeks away! I will finally be able to wear my new heels I bought on sale last Fall, once the snow melts!
Angeleno – Last week, my Tinder hook-up’s rubber broke. I am so relieved today; my STD panel came back negative…Booyah!
“A sweet surprise awaits you.”
Canadian – You get a free ‘double-double’ at Tim Hortons when you buy a dozen Tim Bits!
Angeleno – Valet parking, that normally runs $20 at this fine establishment, is comp for the event! Sweeeet!
“Your talents will be rewarded and recognized.’’
Canadian – You were right, the Oilers won in overtime, the Molsons are on me tonight!
Angeleno – OMG you were right, that guy was married; you totally saved me from getting hurt by that lying loser. Your social media investigative skills are brilliant, can I buy you a drink as a thank you?
“The coming month shall bring winds of change in your life.”
Canadian – The wind from the storm that caused Tornados to touch down in parts of Manitoba, blew down three trees in my yard. I’ve got hours of yard work to do now!
Angeleno – The damn Santa Ana’s winds are blowing again, and my allergies are out of control. I need to buy some waterproof mascara, as my eyes are running constantly!
“When the flowers bloom, so will be great joy in your life.”
Canadian – I am so sick of the winter and the snow, I will actually leap for joy when I see the dandelions growing in my grass.
Angeleno – Finally my neighbor’s bougainvillea are blooming, at least now I don’t have to see his dumb ass through the fence.
“You are headed in the right direction. Trust your instincts.”
Canadian – I have driven this road a hundred times. This blizzard isn’t going to keep me from going to the hockey game tonight.
Angeleno – I don’t care what ‘WAZE’ is telling you to do – this is my hood, take Olympic!
“You will be traveling and coming into a fortune.”
Canadian – So glad I took my car out in this ‘sheeety’ weather eh. Both the Superstore and Canadian Tire were having sales; I save a ‘sheeet-load!’
Angeleno– OMG it is so true, Gas is way cheaper in the desert. Dude, I saved a ton!
“You will be rewarded for being a good listener.”
Canadian – ‘I am so glad you heard that there was black ice on that section of the highway. I took the four wheel drive and passed at least 10 cars that hit the ditch on that stretch of road. I owe you one, buddy.’
Angeleno – “Thank God you heard that President Obama was in town. If you hadn’t told me which roads to avoid, I would have been stuck in a traffic-nightmare-from-hell and would have missed my audition entirely. I so owe you a cocktail!
“You have a captivating style all your own.”
Canadian – ‘Seriously, I get a lot of compliments when I pair my Winnipeg Jets jersey with my Jets tuque and Jets mitts. A fashion statement ‘fur shur’, you betcha!’
Angeleno – ‘My fashion tip; Tiaras go with everything!’
Allow yourself time – you will reach success.”
Canadian – ‘I finally skied the summit at Lake Lousie! And it was awesome, Fuckin’ eh!
Angeleno – ‘OMG I biked 20 miles in the spin class today, my best ever. I never thought I could do it. I am drenched in sweat. You know, Equinox made me do it, lol!’
You see….It is all how you look at life. There are miracles every day in your life, and good things happen every day….Enjoy each day, make the most of it, don’t wait for a Fortune Cookie Fortune to come true. Don’t keep hoping that you will win the lottery and then your life will be great. Make the most and best of your life now – make your own miracles happen and live your life, as this life we have is truly…a Gift.
If you enjoyed this story, or were inspired please like, forward, or share with a friend. Or if it made you crave Chinese food and wine, well then….enjoy!
If you are stuck in traffic going from the 10 to the 405 to the…… you can click on the audio link below. xo
If you want to know the history of the Fortune Cookie, Click on the link below
Written by Janell Martin
Edited by Mary Beth Sterling